Post by ~|*|~Ashley~|*|~ on Feb 16, 2006 21:22:33 GMT -5
Things to do in K-Mart
-Set all the alarm clocks in house wares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
-Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor to the rest rooms.
-Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3 in house wares' and see what happens.
-Go to the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
-Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
-Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll only invite them in if they bring pillows from the bedding department.
-When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'
-Look right into the security camera and use it as a mirror while you pick your nose.
-While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti-depressants are.
-Dart around the store suspiciously while loudly humming the theme from 'Mission Impossible'.
-In the auto department practice your Madonna look using different size funnels.
-Hide in the clothing rack and when people browse through, say 'PICK ME! PICK ME!!!!!!'
-When an announcement comes over the loud speaker assume the fetal position and scream 'NO! NO! It's those voices again'.
-Go into a fitting room and yell real loudly... 'Hey! We're out of toilet paper in here!'
-Ride those little electronic cars at the front of the store.
-Challenge other customers to duels with tubes of gift-wrap.
-Leave cryptic messages on the typewriters.
-Re-dress the mannequins as you see fit.
-Play with the automatic doors.
-While walking through the clothing department, ask yourself loud enough for all to hear, 'Who BUYS this crap, anyway?'
-Ride a display bicycle through the store; claim you're taking it for a 'test drive.'
-As the cashier runs your purchases over the scanner, look mesmerized and say, 'Wow. Magic!'
-Test the fishing rods and see what you can 'catch' from the other aisles.
-Drape a blanket around your shoulders and run around saying, '...I'm Batman. Come, Robin--to the Batcave!'
-TP as much of the store as possible.
-Randomly throw things over into neighboring aisles.
-Play with the calculators so that they all spell 'hello' upside down.
-When two or three people are walking ahead of you, run between them, yelling, 'Red Rover!'
-Make up nonsense products and ask newly hired employees if there are any in stock, i.e., 'Do you have any Shnerples here?'
-Take up an entire aisle in Toys by setting up a full scale battlefield with G.I. Joes vs. the X-Men.
-Hold indoor shopping cart races.
-Attempt to fit into very large gym bags.
-Say things like, 'Would you be so kind as to direct me to your Twinkies?'
-Set up a 'Valet Parking' sign in front of the store.
-Two words: 'Marco Polo.'
-When someone steps away from their cart to look at something, quickly make off with it without saying a word.
All credit goes to Gawain, for e-mailing it to me!!
-Set all the alarm clocks in house wares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
-Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor to the rest rooms.
-Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3 in house wares' and see what happens.
-Go to the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
-Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
-Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll only invite them in if they bring pillows from the bedding department.
-When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'
-Look right into the security camera and use it as a mirror while you pick your nose.
-While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti-depressants are.
-Dart around the store suspiciously while loudly humming the theme from 'Mission Impossible'.
-In the auto department practice your Madonna look using different size funnels.
-Hide in the clothing rack and when people browse through, say 'PICK ME! PICK ME!!!!!!'
-When an announcement comes over the loud speaker assume the fetal position and scream 'NO! NO! It's those voices again'.
-Go into a fitting room and yell real loudly... 'Hey! We're out of toilet paper in here!'
-Ride those little electronic cars at the front of the store.
-Challenge other customers to duels with tubes of gift-wrap.
-Leave cryptic messages on the typewriters.
-Re-dress the mannequins as you see fit.
-Play with the automatic doors.
-While walking through the clothing department, ask yourself loud enough for all to hear, 'Who BUYS this crap, anyway?'
-Ride a display bicycle through the store; claim you're taking it for a 'test drive.'
-As the cashier runs your purchases over the scanner, look mesmerized and say, 'Wow. Magic!'
-Test the fishing rods and see what you can 'catch' from the other aisles.
-Drape a blanket around your shoulders and run around saying, '...I'm Batman. Come, Robin--to the Batcave!'
-TP as much of the store as possible.
-Randomly throw things over into neighboring aisles.
-Play with the calculators so that they all spell 'hello' upside down.
-When two or three people are walking ahead of you, run between them, yelling, 'Red Rover!'
-Make up nonsense products and ask newly hired employees if there are any in stock, i.e., 'Do you have any Shnerples here?'
-Take up an entire aisle in Toys by setting up a full scale battlefield with G.I. Joes vs. the X-Men.
-Hold indoor shopping cart races.
-Attempt to fit into very large gym bags.
-Say things like, 'Would you be so kind as to direct me to your Twinkies?'
-Set up a 'Valet Parking' sign in front of the store.
-Two words: 'Marco Polo.'
-When someone steps away from their cart to look at something, quickly make off with it without saying a word.
All credit goes to Gawain, for e-mailing it to me!!